I wrote this letter over a year ago, just as we were about to begin fertility treatments. I had no idea what the future would hold and when (or if) I could expect a baby girl. But for some reason, I felt very close to her at that particular moment and was inspired to write this letter. I wanted to post it as a reminder to myself of what I hope to be as a mother.
A letter to my unborn daughter, Aug. 12, 2012 Tonight I was being silly with Lucy, resting on her chest and asking her silly questions like "what are you most afraid of? Starving to death? A house fire? That Alex and I will die and you will have to live somewhere else?" She finally groaned (telling me to get off of her) and at that point I had an thought that maybe you were in heaven, looking down at us and thinking that we would be a fun family to have, and maybe even asking if you would be allowed to come down a little bit earlier. I hope you can and I hope you do. I was listening to a talk by Truman G. Madsen this morning and he shared the thought that children might have a little bit of a say in where and when they come. I think you have picked us out. Or maybe you have been assigned. Either way, I am grateful for you and I want to get to know you. I know for sure I can't promise to be a perfect mother, and sometimes I probably won't even be a good mother. But I will love you even when you make mistakes. I will encourage you to love life for the joy of living and discovering and creating. I will encourage you to do things you want to do, and to work hard at them. Not because you need to achieve anything, but because God will give you and has given us His children so many gifts and a beautiful world and precious time to enjoy it and make it a better place. I will set a few firm limits that I will expect you to live by. This won't just be so that our home will run better but so that you will have the steadiness and peace of an ordered life and knowing that someone cares about who you are and who you become and so that you will learn consequences to your choices. I will do my best to let you be who you are and to love you for exactly who you are. There will be no "other daughter" that I wish you were. I want you to be you. I will provide you with and teach you to make nutritious meals and teach you the wonderful gift that your body is and how to take care of it. I will teach you to appreciate beautiful things - music, art, and nature. I will teach you to love the word of God and to follow God's plan for you, His daughter. I will teach you to find joy and comfort in the Plan of Redemption and the Atonement. I know that I will make mistakes. We want you in our family to have a part in nurturing your soul and to provide a temporary home for you on this earth, but it also for us to progress on our journey to become more like God. Just as you are expected to make wrong choices on your journey, we are too. I hope you can forgive us for the many mistakes that we will make. I already feel love for you and I don't know you and I don't know when you will be coming. Love, mom
A letter to my unborn daughter, Aug. 12, 2012 Tonight I was being silly with Lucy, resting on her chest and asking her silly questions like "what are you most afraid of? Starving to death? A house fire? That Alex and I will die and you will have to live somewhere else?" She finally groaned (telling me to get off of her) and at that point I had an thought that maybe you were in heaven, looking down at us and thinking that we would be a fun family to have, and maybe even asking if you would be allowed to come down a little bit earlier. I hope you can and I hope you do. I was listening to a talk by Truman G. Madsen this morning and he shared the thought that children might have a little bit of a say in where and when they come. I think you have picked us out. Or maybe you have been assigned. Either way, I am grateful for you and I want to get to know you. I know for sure I can't promise to be a perfect mother, and sometimes I probably won't even be a good mother. But I will love you even when you make mistakes. I will encourage you to love life for the joy of living and discovering and creating. I will encourage you to do things you want to do, and to work hard at them. Not because you need to achieve anything, but because God will give you and has given us His children so many gifts and a beautiful world and precious time to enjoy it and make it a better place. I will set a few firm limits that I will expect you to live by. This won't just be so that our home will run better but so that you will have the steadiness and peace of an ordered life and knowing that someone cares about who you are and who you become and so that you will learn consequences to your choices. I will do my best to let you be who you are and to love you for exactly who you are. There will be no "other daughter" that I wish you were. I want you to be you. I will provide you with and teach you to make nutritious meals and teach you the wonderful gift that your body is and how to take care of it. I will teach you to appreciate beautiful things - music, art, and nature. I will teach you to love the word of God and to follow God's plan for you, His daughter. I will teach you to find joy and comfort in the Plan of Redemption and the Atonement. I know that I will make mistakes. We want you in our family to have a part in nurturing your soul and to provide a temporary home for you on this earth, but it also for us to progress on our journey to become more like God. Just as you are expected to make wrong choices on your journey, we are too. I hope you can forgive us for the many mistakes that we will make. I already feel love for you and I don't know you and I don't know when you will be coming. Love, mom
Thanks for making me tear up!! That was beautiful. You are and I am sure that your daughter will be even more so!! Well, as long as she takes after her Mother. Sorry Alex. Just kidding!!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful! What a blessing that she gets to come so soon! You are going to be a wonderful mother :)
ReplyDeleteKatie, I am very impressed with your sweet letter to your daughter of Hope :-) Love you!
ReplyDeleteThis touched me, all of it, and especially that part when you said she was looking down from heaven thinking you guys might be a fun family to come too. So true. You are a fun family. I hope you get to meet that daughter of yours someday soon. Love you lots.
ReplyDeleteYour mom made mistakes but she always tried her best. You will too. You will be a wonderful mother. That which you sacrifice for you love dearly. That's why moms love so much, akin to the love our Savior has for us.
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